Well I took a good hard look at the money I have coming in vs what is going out and what needs to go out. If it wasn't for contract fees the cell phones would be gone! I am going to get caught up somehow and learn to budget for emergencies. Joe is going to have to get a job whatever that may be. He has been putting out resumes but in this market there is nothing.
Christmas is going to be me and the kids showing up I HATE not being able to get gifts for people but this year it is what it is.
So I am sorry Mom and Dad, Mike Joey, Ryan and Faith Santa is not coming this year.
Might be able to do Christmas, after Christmas is over that might work.
I just hate this so much it is tearing me up inside and making my anxiety worse. I called a councillor tonight and talked to her for an hour and they are making me an appointment at a therapist in the city, I should hear in about 48 hours from him. I know I need to see someone and I need to make an appointment with the yoga place too and learn the breathing techniques to help with my panic attacks too.
I think this year I am going to have to learn to eat leaner, exercise daily, meditate daily and pray more to Goddess/God/Spirit.